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Sharing knowledge and advise from a counsellor
Debunking 5 Common Myths About Counselling
Feeling unsure about whether counselling is right for you? You're definitely not alone. Many people consider seeking support but are held back by misconceptions. In my previous post, I touched on the benefits of counselling, but in this post, I will tackle some of the common myths that can prevent us from reaching out for the help we deserve.
Myth 1
“Counselling is just someone telling me what to do.”
Contrary to this common misconception a counsellor is not an adviser. Our role is to empower you to make your own decisions through exploration of your feelings, relationships and patterns of behaviour. A counsellor listens carefully and asks insightful questions to enable growth and a deeper self awareness.
Liz always helps everyone and has no time for reading, which she really enjoys. In her counselling sessions she realises that she feels unappreciated and resentful towards her family and that she needs some boundaries to give her time to relax and read.
Myth 2
“Only people with serious problems need counselling.”
This is a common myth. Counselling is a valuable resource to anyone needing support, not just those in crisis. Whether you're feeling stressed, stuck, overwhelmed, or just need someone to talk to, counselling can help. You don’t need to hit ‘rock bottom’ to benefit from it.
Liz came to sessions because when she spoke to her family she was often met with comments like “You should always help family”. Counselling allowed her to speak to someone who could listen to how she felt without judgement.
Myth 3
“Talking about things will just make them worse.”
This myth can cause a lot of anxiety, however, sharing feelings which burden you in a safe space can alleviate them and bring clarity. Suppressing emotions may have a negative physical impact upon the body.
In sessions Liz’s feelings were validated and she was not “selfish” for wanting time for herself. Counselling helped her to find a better balance between helping others and pursuing what makes her happy. Liz found that her sleep improved the more she made time for herself.
Myth 4
“Counselling takes years to work.”
While it is true some people engage in long-term therapy, others find just a few sessions helpful. It depends on your goals and what you want to explore—there’s no one-size-fits-all.
Liz spent 12 weeks in sessions and noticed an improvement in her life. Liz did begin to notice that some of her behaviours were linked to her childhood and was aware that she may want to come back to counselling at a later date to explore these in more depth.
Myth 5
“Counsellors will judge me.”
This is a particularly common fear for our clients. Non-judgment is a core principle of counselling. In building a therapeutic relationship, a counsellor prioritizes understanding your unique worldview. While they may introduce other perspectives, this is intended to expand your understanding, never to evaluate or judge you.
In counselling Liz expressed that she felt lazy when she would rather be curled up with a book than giving her sister a lift into town. Her counsellor encouraged her to consider how she would feel towards a friend in this situation who said no to their sister. This perspective allowed Liz to see how harshly she judged herself.
Taking the step to consider counselling is a brave one, and it's okay to have unanswered questions. If you are looking for a counsellor in Ipswich, or online and any other concerns are holding you back, I encourage you to book a free, confidential 20-minute consultation. This is your opportunity to speak openly and gain a better understanding of how counselling can support you. I'm here to listen and help you explore your options.
Curious About Counselling? Here's What It Can Do For You
Navigating life's challenges can feel overwhelming, and you might be wondering if counselling is the right path for you. In this blog, we'll explain what counselling is, clarify what you can expect from the process, and explore the reasons why it can be a beneficial tool for your wellbeing.
Emotional Support and Validation: Often when we are experiencing difficult emotions we can feel alone. When we talk to our friends and family we may be met with advice on what we should be doing or hear stories of others who are “worse off”. In our sessions, my aim is to truly hear what it is you are experiencing, helping you to understand your thoughts, feelings and emotions are valid.
Gaining New Perspectives and Insights: Within sessions we will explore patterns of thoughts, feelings and behaviours. We will look at why these arise and how they impact you. This can aid in gaining a new perspective of your challenges whilst uncovering blind spots and gaining a deeper understanding of yourself and your experiences of life.
Developing Coping Mechanisms and Skills: As we explore the difficulties you face in life we can uncover strategies for managing stress, anxiety, depression, and other mental health concerns which work for you. For someone struggling with anxiety, this might involve grounding techniques or a safety plan for those with thoughts of self harm. Through exploration of relationships and behaviour patterns you can improve your communication and problem-solving skills. Learning how to better regulate emotions is another key aspect of counselling, which can significantly improve your resilience in facing future challenges.
Improved Self-Awareness: I personally believe improved self-awareness to be an invaluable asset as it leads to a more fulfilling life with a greater sense of purpose. In counselling we explore and gain a greater understanding of what motivates you, the roots of your beliefs and values, and your dreams and aspirations for life.
Healing from Past Trauma and Difficult Experiences: Past hurts can often feel difficult to discuss, counselling offers you a safe space to process and learn to manage the symptoms of trauma. This promotes growth and healing.
Enhanced Relationships: Throughout counselling we explore the way we relate to others, fostering a better understanding of the dynamics and patterns within your relationships, leading to more fulfilling connections and reduced conflict. We can explore the importance of and benefits of setting healthy boundaries.
Increased Self-Esteem and Confidence: In sessions I can help you to identify and challenge negative views you hold of yourself and help you to gain a stronger sense of self-worth through exploring your strength and abilities.
Breaking Unhealthy Patterns: Counselling can help you identify and understand unhelpful behaviours or thought patterns. Exploring these patterns together will help you to develop strategies to break free from these patterns.
A Confidential Space: Counselling is confidential, and your privacy is respected. What you share is kept private, with the exception of legal and ethical obligations such as safeguarding concerns, acts of terrorism, drug trafficking, and money laundering. In all other circumstances, your open and honest thoughts remain secure within the counselling room.
The idea of reaching out for help can feel daunting, and uncertainty about counselling is understandable. I hope this blog has given you a clearer idea of what to expect. If you're in Ipswich or interested in online sessions and are still exploring whether counselling could be beneficial for you, I offer a free consultation as a chance to talk things through. There's absolutely no pressure to begin sessions afterwards.
The Importance of Connection
How often do you find yourself "doom scrolling" on social media? Feeling disappointed by the lack of views or likes? Are you comparing yourself to the experiences of others? We look to social media to feel connected to others but is that what we are achieving?
Connection is a basic human need. When we feel connected to others oxytocin is released and we feel a sense of comfort and contentment. This same hormone is why we love the smell of a babies head or feel calm when stoking a pet. We often forget the importance of connection on our mental health and look for quick solutions to our problems. It is important for us to continue to connect not only to others but the world around us. The more we are able to experience connection stored in our memory the better equipped we are for difficult times. Here are a few strategies to help deepen your connections and enrich your mental well-being
Nature
Connecting with the world around us can be as simple as taking a walk in your local park, sitting in the garden to watch and listen to birds singing, or strolling along the beach while the waves crash and the sand shifts beneath your feet. It might mean pausing to admire a breathtaking sunset or letting your imagination wander as you spot shapes in the clouds.
These small yet profound moments help us feel deeply connected to nature and remind us of our place within the world around us.
Creativity
Connecting to our creativity can take many forms—drawing, painting, writing, or even simply scribbling on a page. Creativity is an innate ability we all possess, and engaging in it allows us to explore our inner selves, process our emotions, and forge a deeper connection with who we are
Music and Movement
From timeless classics to heavy metal, music has the power to connect us—not only with others but also with ourselves. It stirs our emotions, inspires creativity, and often encourages movement, whether it's expressive dance or a workout on the treadmill. Through movement, we deepen our connection to our bodies, fostering both physical and emotional well-being
Connecting with Others
To return to where I began, connection to others is essential. This might mean sharing our art, moving in harmony, exchanging stories, or expressing affection through touch. However, there are times when, even in the company of others, we might feel unseen or unheard—leading to a sense of isolation.
Counselling can provide a safe and supportive space to explore these connections, deepen our understanding of ourselves, and foster a sense of being truly understood
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